A Completly Confusing Love story
by MissDracoMalfoy90
Summary: It begings with extracts from the diary of Draco Malfoy, about Hermione starting a job at the same place as Draco and what he really feels for her. It ends with a narrative of what ends up happening... hope you enjoy


**The diary of one Draco Malfoy**

**Chapter 6: extracts about Hermione Granger**

_Life is a like an array of fireworks on new years eve. For a short period of time they are outstanding and magical and light our world with their magnifigance. They then die away to be forgotten untill comes a time when they are needed once again. Everyone deserves their time to shine, everyone. But one woman in particular deserves far more attention, far more often than she ever believed she should, even if that shining moment isn't with me like it should be. So if everyone else get their time in the limelight... why don't I? _

**28.06.01**

Today i woke up, got dressed, had breakfast, packed my lunch, grabbed my broomstick and headed off to work like anyone else. I took the scenic route over the mountains to the office today (using the flu network is quick but you lose the magical feeling when you do that) It was just another day and i wasn't expecting anything other than the norm, so it surprised me when on my desk a letter. It said

_"A miss hermione Granger has recently been employed at the centre of magical affinity with humanity, sector 7: historical affinity. i would like you Mr Malfoy to show her around and make her welcome. She say's that she knows you from school and i have decided that you should be the one to help her. A friendly face never killed anyone, so please don't screw this up, she's worth a million galleons here._

_Sir Erik Newton_

_Managing Director"_

Bloody barmy he is! thank god he didn't know the full extent of our "relationship" suppose it's a good thing he's not a local english wizard. The Americans always did seem so ignorant of us, always though they were better and more pure. never th less he is a good man and knows how to run the comapany.

Anyway i had just finished reading the letter when Mr Newton came over to my desk, and of course trailing behind sheepishly was Hermione. It was my fourth year at hogwarts when i finally realised that i was jealous of her. she was smart and had true friends that actually cared about her. Foolishly i turned jealousy into hatered. I used all my feeling and turned it on her and her pathetic friends. God knows why they forgave me. It wasn't until after the war i realised my jealousy had turned into something i could never had imagined _love_.

after three years of desperatly loving someone so untouchable, so pure and good. After three years of having purposly pushed this feeling to the back of my icy heart, she turns up out of the blue to work at the centre, with me! Mr Newton was smiling as he intoduced us "Miss Granger, Mr Malfoy" I was trembbling all over, i don't know how i didn'ty collapse right there, (oh no i waited till i got home before i did that). So i did my duty and i showed her around. The thing was though, she was quiet and the vibes i felt from her were wary. i didn't know what to do so i set her to work filing papers for the rest of the day, and when i finished i sent her home with a curt nod and a pathetic " see you tomorrow Miss Granger" I mean how unintelligent is that. Merlins beard how i ever thought i would have a chance with her.

**12.07.01**

It has been two weeks since Hermione has been working at the centre. And still i have not found the courage to go and have a conversation with her. Yesterday when i went to gringotts during lunch hour, i saw her sitting out the front of moaning mertyles patisserie. Not doing much but reading Luna Lovegood's Quibbler, and sipping at her latte. I must have looked like a complete git staring, but i couldn't help it. There was something about the way she looked that had changed and i couldn't figure it out... then stupidly i start tracing down her body with my eyes down to her legs then sliding back up to her breasts where i stopped. Since when did Hermione Granger have breasts! she never did in school.

But then thankfully Mrs Haughton called out to me. I still think she noticed me when she looked up though. I could swear i saw her smile just slightly. Merlins leg! which embarasses me even more! what will i do when i go to work tomorrow ' oh sorry hermionie for feeling you up with my eyes yesterday, i just hadn't noticed you were and actual woman with huge boobies!'

I have to talk to her soon i have to. She is a beautiful woman and soon she'll be snagged up by Kurtis Bones. by far the most confident man at the centre and he always get the women he wants. Bloody hell i need to sort my pathetic life out!

**19.08.01**

The past month has been a complete shamble. I tried having a conversation with her a few weeks ago and it all turned to utter dung! I asked how her day was going and then all of a sudden she yells at me! she kept saying that she should be doing something more productive than filing papers! and that she was a historian hired for researching history and not for sitting in a dingy little chair! She blew up litterally! well ok not litterally but if she was a firework she would have been red if you know what i'm saying. And what did clever old me say back... well i said that she was new and needed to start of like the rest of us did, small and useless until she had proven her self good enough to be noticed.

The look she gave me was utterly horrid. Those big brown eyes bored into mine like a miners drill cursing at my soul within me. She knew my secrets and from that look i knew that she had not forgiven me and probably never would. The next thing i knew i was watching her stamp out the room, knocking the files of papers to the floor. Mental because then i had to go and file it all over again, Which made me angry so i picked up a chair and smashed it on the table whcih then messed up all the other files which made me angrier! It was not how i had planned the conversation at all.

Well the next couple of weeks i tried to make it up to her. I was sending her out on errands rather than keeping her cooped up inside all day. i let her go into the library, talk to people about magical and human histories, but still she refused to try and accept my apology. I hate this feeling I'm so angry with her but at the same time it kills me not to see her every day. If she went away and quit the job, i don't know what i would do. Even though she hates me right now, the only reason i'm going to work these days is so i can see her. It's the closest i'll ever get to being with her. At night i dream of her with Kurtis Bones and then she kisses him while im watching and she stares into my eyes, daring me to beg forgivness. It's madness and it's driving me insane.

Hermione I love you!

**30.08.01**

Bollocks bollocks BOLLOCKS! Bloody merlins saggy left bloody testicle! no no no this can't be happening! Hermione and Kurtis are a couple. fancy that! bloody bollocks! does she not understand. i stare at her every day from across the room i make her coffee i ask her about her day and all she does is tease the fuck out of me. I know she's not doing it on purpose but seriously does she have to snog him infront of me!

Today i was just minding my own business reading through an old article from the muggle newsapaper in Australia "The Australian" about a girl who made things fly without touching them and how she said that it was god's git to her. utter nonsense some muggles, i tell you! well anywho i was minding my own business when Kurtis comes waltzing up to me. He said "Oi Drac my man you coming out for a drink with me and me little lady this arvo?" I mean seriously who talks like that! oh but then then get this then he said this "you bringing someone too i hope thenhermione will actually have someone to talk to other than us blokes" got his accent drives me mad!

So then i, completly gob smacked that my premenition had actually come true, decided to punch the fucker in the face! how daft can i get! no wait how stupid can hermione actually be to fall for his ludicruis tricks. I have seen him pull those stunts before and i know it will end in tears. i know he is just going to hurt her. But then THEN just as i was ready to walk out hermione comes running from the library yells her head off at me, pulls Kurtis up and then full on snogs his head off. well that made me pissed so i walked out just left. But now i have to explain what happened with Newton and he wont be happy. I'm sure he'll already know by now...

this is so fucked up...

**10.09.01**

The day after i punched Kurtis Newton came up to me and almost fire me... i suppose i deserve everything i get right now. i still can't believe that i did it. It has been three years since i have lost my temper like that... over the weekend i sat inside all day waving my wand around, making things turn to jelly so they would bounce... just out of curiosity of course oh and complete utter boredom... and i also turned anything important to me into china so when i tossed it to the ground it would smash... yes what a lovly weekend i had.

To tell the truth i just can't do this any more. this normal nice happy draco isn't the real me. i have lived most of my life worshipping evil and making hermione's life a living hell. destroying her friendship, calling her appauling names and just making life miserable. Which is exactly how i feel now... gob smaking miserable and even cherry brandy acn't take away this feeling of utter idiocy.

tomorrow i have work again... and the next day and the next day and the next day...I have to sit there day after day watching hermione get a bunch of roses and a kiss on the cheek from the one person who i hate these days and i can't bear the thought of it. Kurtis making her believe she is his everything. It's all just lies i know it is. Kurtis never has a steady relationship with any one. this can not last. Can it?

**31.10.01**

Still my heart aches as i watch her kiss him goodnight and good morning. I watch as he drives her home and imagine her going inside with him. imagine him running his dirty hands up and down her body, kissing her lips. That should me me... It will never be me. I dreamed of her again last night. this time she was at home crying and no one was around... Not even Kurtis. An Article was infront of her showing a bold title "Hermione Murdered". The dream has me so boggled you can't imagine how i feel. She's well and happy with "Mr. Prick" but she's happy and certainly not dead.

**4.11.01**

five months and Hermione now takes no more notcie of me than she did in school. Merlins Beard how i've tried to get her attention, but i don't know what im doing or how to get her away from Kurtis. It's all so difficult to comprahend. i can't face her anymore. her eyes have never touched mine since the day she glared at me and i have never set foot near her desk where kurtis has now been permanantly moved. I knew it was never going to happen but when i look at her my heart cracks and clenches like a chain has been bound around it forbidding me to ever try to win her heart because it knows i will fail.

If my parents were here what would they think of their pathetic weak son who cant even ask a girl out for a drink. OR even a chat!

i can't keep on going like this. I must tell her how i feel or my life will be a living hell. yeah right... there is no way i will be able to tell her that i'm completly and utterly in love with her and have been since well... fourth year at school! she'll laugh at me i just know it. hell when did i become such a little Neville Longbottom after he's seen snape!

I can't help but wonder... all these years... why didn't hermione just out me, i mean tell the professors about me and how horrid i used to be to her... but she never did, even when i called her a mudblood several times... but the first time i did she cried and ran off, why didn't she tell on me then? i'm so confused...

**27.11.01 **

What's the bloody point in trying anymore, when i went to speak to her last week... well i went over to her desk when Kurtis wasn't there (miracurously) and i said to her that we should go for a coffee and mertyles and she blantly refused! i'm trying to make up what i have done to her... i really am! well it wasn't really harsh the way she said no, well not at all in fact she was sad she looked as though she had been crying when i went up to her. then i asked her and then she was just like "No , no, no, i musn't that wouldn't be right" Then she excused her self and left i could have sworn she was crying again.

Well that wasn't the worst of it, three days later, my eagle owl came swooping in and landed neatly on his perch. Blimey he's a loyal bird. Anyway i took the letter he held with his claws and turned it over in my hands a couple of times. It looked like some really old expensive parchment framed with gold lacings and on the back to stamp it shut was the Bones family crest. I had seen it whenever Kurtis walked past hanging like a fucking medalion from his neck.

I undid the letter, but i regretted it at once. guess what it said.

"You have been formally invited to the holy matromony of Kurtis Edgar Bones and Hermione Jean Granger"

What The FUCK! they have known each other for about four months and he's already got her under his spell. i thought she knew a love potion when she saw one! unless she's actually really in love with him... no that can't be right... no.. can it?

**Back in the real world from draco's point of view **

It was a tuesday morning and i was awake early. I opened the curtains to the manor with a single flick of my wand and light flooded in. Down on the front lawn were a small herd of aethonon grazing happily. A young one was trying to fly with it's under developed wings and was only making it two feet off the ground before falling back to earth. It was a beautiful sight to watch.

Momentarialy i had forgotton about the letter i had recieved about Hermione's wedding. It was absolutly ludicrus. i just knew that kurtis was going to hurt her, break her heart somehow. never the less i still had to go to work, like i did every day. I did my morning routine the grabbed my broomstick and left, waving goodbye to mildred the houskeeper elf.

I was tired and worn and any little thing that happened, irritated me and i got angry. I even convinced myself once again that i hated Hermione Granger. I let the anger flow through my body, like red flames licking my insides. I landed harshly out the front of the centre, threw my broom in the closet and screamed at the doors to open.

Hermione was already sitting at her desk reading some report on human magicians. The sight of her made me angrier, almost as angry as i had been once in school. She had hurt me so badly i couldn't handle it. I stormed straight up to her with far more confidence than i ever had previously. "Hermione, are you MENTAL?" i yelled at her slamming the wedding invite down in front of her.

Stunned she looked up at me, and for a second i thought she was going to cry, but then her features changed into something violent. "me! ME! the mental one! Draco you can't honestly expect me to answer that vile question do you? I sit here day after day watching you, doing all your bidding, coming whenever you call me, we are constantly working in close proximities constantly in the same fucking room! When did you become such the coward Malfoy. Look at your self and honestly tell me what's on your mind, please tell me because forgive me but i thought you actually cared about me but i guess not, i must have been wrong"

By this time she was bawling and shouting, her face going a bright crimson.

"Now if you'll get the hell out of my way i have to be somewhere, you foul, loathsome, evil little cockroach!"

Those words cut me deep. They were the same words she used right before she punched me in third year. If she used those words then i knew she felt exactly the same about me now as she did back then. i couldn't saty at work i knew i was bound to hurt someone and it would probably have been Kurtis. I left the centre and flew home.

It had been 4 hours. I was sitting in my arm chair with a glass of cherry brandy, the bottle on the table next to me. I was done. I had given up trying i didn't want to try any more i coudn't be bothered. I turned the wedding invitation over in my free hand. i read every golden letter like it was the one thing that had killed me. I read it over and over and each time it tore a hole in my chest. Hermione was gone. she was marrying a fool and didn't know it. i read the invite again. what was she thinking sending me a wedding invitation. Why on earth would i go to that! then i read the date. it was written in bold golden letters, bolder than the rest of the words. " Tuesday 11th december" i stood up as soon as i read the date and ran over to my calender. and sure enough it was the 11th of december. "Oh Hell" i then read the time "7.30pm" "Oh Hell Hell!" It was already Seven.

I grabbed my coat and ran to the fire place. As loudly as i could i yelled the place of the wedding and threw the flu powder down. in a burst of green flames i spun round and round until i landed neatly in the fireplace of the room next to where the wedding was taking place.

I ran round the corner and crawled into a seat at the back.

The next thing i saw blew me away. Hermione had begun to walk down the aisle. Looking like a goddess she walked to the steady beat of the wedding march. her skin glowed in the light and her hair fell to the small of her back in a neat little wave. My God she was beautiful.

As it proceeded i sat there waiting, my silent tears falling down my face. I couldn't handle this anymore i had to speak up. No i couldn't do that. It would destroy her. she was happy. i loved her enough to finally let her go. All i ever wanted was for her to be happy and now she was. i couldn't hold my sobs in much longer, i had to get out. just as the priest said "Speak now of forever hold you peace" i ran for it knocking the chair next to me over. I had to get out before i ruined her life.

I ran onto the little gravel road out the front of the wedding hall. I screamed my anger out and collapsed to my knees. my whole body shuddering with sobs. it wasn't until i heard the slam of the doors behind me that i turned around to see who was there.

Hermione was standing at the top of the steps. her face tear streaked and her hair windblown as if she had run out here. "Draco!" she stared at me for what felt like eons, and then all of a sudden she came running up to me, she fell to her knees, grabbed my face and kissed me. A kiss that could last forever, a kiss that meant more than just some crush, a kiss that meant more than pity a kiss that meant she loved me. "I love you Draco Malfoy" she breathed in my ear and kissed me again.

And here it was. My shining moment. My time in the lime light. The time when no one else mattered except me, i had been noticed. I had fallen in love. And she had fallen in love with me.


End file.
